Thinking About Getting a Long Little Doggie

So, I wanted my own dogs to have grandchildren for me, but, alas, Florida is going as California went and another freedom is gone. Now, the City of South Daytona is adopting L.A.’s mandatory spay and neuter law for six-month old dogs and cats. Pet overpopulation has long been in crisis and you now know what the rest of the country may soon be thinking.

But here’s what I’m thinking.

I’m thinking they’re only giving you six months to take care of this? It takes me longer than that to get around to vacuuming. Or laundry. Once, showering.

I’m thinking, what about freedom of choice? In case of accidents, insufficient access to birth-control information, or if we know we won’t be able to take care of our puppies, we should be able to take our bitches to the local abortionist. Just like we do with our teenagers.

I’m also thinking that if the states would take a peep into their penal system, they’d find a wealth of bored detainees who’d more than happily euthanize these small animals. For free. Without any equipment even. Just like when they were little kids. And for future reference, they’d probably take care of the old and infirm, too, in case those laws are already in the planning stages.

And I’m thinking that instead of complaining about the cost of unwanted pets, America’s coastal states are in prime position to take a bite out of the Asian trade deficit by exporting what’s now Chinese food. Finally, we’ve been given our own shot at cornering a foreign market of all-you-can-eat buffets.