Thinking About Socializing

So, even though it was designed for the younger generation, millions of old-timers are creating Facebook pages of their own. I guess they’re thinking they’re still in the prime of their social networking life.

But here’s what I’m thinking:

I’m thinking that you’re too old for Facebook when the “browsing for people you know” function serves mainly as an exercise for your cobwebby memory. Instead of networking, you are at the point when it’s an achievement when you can remember anyone’s last names. And sometimes their first names. Or their faces. Or the names of your schools. When it gets to where your reply to every add-a-friend is “Who in the hell are you?”, it’s time to check into a prescription for Aricept.

You’re too old for facebook when you have to squint to recognize who’s in the profile pictures. Well, they are kind of small, so maybe that’s okay. And when you then have to grab for the reading glasses, and possibly even the magnifying glass, that’s not so bad either. But when you find that you’re reaching for a microscope, game over.

But most of all I’m thinking that you’re too old for Facebook when you are dutifully answering every email sent, and yet you sit wondering why no one ever writes back again. Until one day you happen to look at your e-mail sent folder and find that there are quite a lot of messages from you addressed to the "No Reply" mailbox. And you still can’t figure it out.